Chin up, St. Louis. At least your football team will go undefeated this season.

SOMEONE PLEASE RESCUE KATIE NOLAN

Just mad because she has a ring and he doesn’t.

The girlfriend isn’t named?

More like Johnny Maninacell

That’s right Clayton! Show him the heater!
-Jamie Moyer.

You need better memories dude.

You’ve got a nice, crisp Tubman coming your way some day.

Make America 8-8 again

7-11 and 9-11 are two very different issues involving Saudis overstaying their visas.

He's now well-qualified to be ordained in the Archdiocese of Boston.

What did they expect when they hired a kid named McLovin

I didn’t before, but I now dislike the Pirates.

The 0-3 Cardinals have struck out a combined 37 times in their three losses.

please let this be a series where you update us every time they lose a game.

“Hello, friends! Which one of you wants to pull really hard on my necktie while I jerk myself off to completion?”

“Unclear if that total included this girl, who has an awful lot of blood on her hand.”

That’s just not how we’re raised. As you can tell, like I said again, it’s the Bible belt. It’s just something that’s, I wouldn’t even say frowned upon, just something that’s nonexistent in most southern homes.