You’re actually less likely to live very long.

Man, you can’t step on someone’s foot; that was definitely a penalty. They have a real chance to break the streak by failing to get out of their group.

But they can employ fewer people in Seattle, the negative effects of which could offset the tax.

How many people are homeless because they were just priced out of the market and not because of mental illness and/or substance abuse?

I miss the days when we would at least pretend there was some possibility LeBron would go to the Knicks.

What gave you that idea? The weasely references to “pro football” or the “sport”? The inapt reference to Kaepernick at the end? Or the giant NFL logo at the top?

This is the players’ union, not the NFL. Very unsurprising that a union is unenthusiastic about policing and punishing its members.

Because the chips include beer garbage in addition to chicken garbage, or maybe so you will recycle them cans? I don’t think a lot of suggestions got shot down in the design meetings for this.

If we’re not going to question this, can we point out some other issues with these bios? Like how they list the “bats/throws” info twice, and for a couple players they’re not even consistent?

Did Catalonia just not participate? Otherwise I assume they would win. It’s also a little weird that this otherwise hipster tournament has a Russian puppet state as its defending champion.

If your collar has two buttons, it’s too big. Also in a few of these photos he looks like Will Arnett and Bill Walton had a son together.

I am not going to provide any context for this, but the Libertarian Party’s head of fundraising once told me, “Libertarians won’t arrest you for much, but fucking a 15 year old will do it.”

Yeah, nobody is “forced” to cross the border illegally. The administration is probably rightly assuming that a lot of these asylum cases are bullshit and that the materials are being used to coach people so they know what to say.

I don’t even understand the basic premise. How did faking his death help them catch anyone?

What makes it even crazier is that the guy didn’t just go into hiding while the authorities made false reports about his death, they actually seem to have made him up to look like he was shot so his wife could find him.

Holy shit, we really have Imperial Japan apologist in the Takeout comments?

Possession of a vuvuzela should be punished with jail time.

This seems... not that bad? Attempted skirt-lifting, unsolicited back rubs and flirting are the most they could come up with for a guy who has been working for like 50 years?

The NBA playoffs are too damn long. Do we really need sixteen goddamn teams in the postseason when maybe three of them have any hope of winning a championship? No, we don’t.

These people were so terrified that they ran straight through Mexico.