I hate you so much right now.

I guess I can’t say for sure that I don’t prefer it, since I haven’t actually watched any of the videos, so trying to put a preference for one over the other is basically dividing by zero. But I don’t plan to start watching the videos either, so I think that makes my preference clear.

I’m not gonna defend this guy, because I don’t know a damn thing about him or anything he has done.

For years, I’ve tried to sell my wife (who did not grow up in America) on pigs in a blanket. It wasn’t until last week that I learned that her resistance was because she did not understand that Lil’ Smokies are not the same as Vieanna Sausages.

Follow-up question: How is Once Upon A Time still on?

That’s because Miracle Whip is an abomination.

The picture of a comically oversized penis sandwich at the top is an odd choice.

¡Ay Caramba!

You just destroyed The AV Club with a single masterful comment!

That will actually be explained in the original series. In the finale, Sheldon will visit a talking teapot that will send him back in time to save Bob Newhart’s character from being killed. Once he’s accomplished that, he will have an incredibly uncomfortable sex scene with Mayim Bialik and wake up in the completely…

I read an analysis somewhere that that runway would have to be over 18 miles long to support that scene. Seems reasonable to me!

In my experience, the sequel to “Unfriended” is “Trying To Remember If This Person Unfriended Me Or If I Unfriended Them So I Can Know Whether Or Not I Should Be Offended.”

Were they doing some sort of Statler and Waldorf cosplay in that picture?

I think it affects people who haven’t experienced the art in question. If I had watched Rick And Morty before, I would be able to judge it on its own merits. But I have no desire to do so, because everything I hear and read about it leaves a sour taste in my mouth.

There’s no reason to think they couldn’t introduce patches that make it as if those glitches never existed.

I was just thinking about revisiting Mother 3. That is, as far as I can recall, the only video game to ever make me feel things.

I used to pick it up on occasion for work lunches. Get a deep dish, store the leftovers in the fridge for the next few days, and you have cheaper lunches than you can make at home.

I drown all frozen and leftover pizza in cajun seasoning.

I’ve had Jet’s twice, and both times it had the same magic property that caused all of the cheese to stay right the fuck in the middle of the box. I don’t know if they sliced it before they baked it, or why that was the case, but I would take a slice, and it would slide right out while the cheese stayed exactly where…

Plus, founder Mike Ilitch was a very good dude who donated a lot of money to worthy causes. The man paid Rosa Parks’ rent for a decade so she could live in a better part of town.