I’m old school internet. Like, I was BBSing back in the late 80s. I like to joke that I’m one of the nerds that helped build it in the 90s.

God almighty, that looks intentional. 

All that really needed to be said here.

This really needs to be at the top. 

how much it must suck to live in L.A.

The big unasked question that most Tesla-stans are undoubtedly asking, “can I fuck it?” was not directly addressed

In LA, the bus driver would’ve kept going to he reached the next bus stop. Those dudes give zero fucks. 

No one in this world, so far as I know—and I have searched the records for years, and employed agents to help me—has ever lost money by underestimating the intelligence of the great masses of the plain people. 

Or people could, you know, just not race on fucking surface roads?

They were KILLED MURDERED.

My mom’s told me stories about grandpa picking her up from school, driving straight to the nearest roadside bar and leaving her in the car to do homework while he went inside to get loaded ... then drive them both home.

I feel smarter, not angrier.

DOUBLE BARREL BUCKSHOT 

You know you’ve really hit the big time when you’re hanging out with Louie Gohmert. 

Impressive. 

My old house in LA (on the edge of Inglewood) appraised for ~$610k in September of last year.

I bought my old house on the edge of Inglewood for $480k back in June 2018.