"The Force can have a strong influence on the weak minded..."

I'm in New York. If I take the job, can I stick my foot in Brian Lam's ass?

Have you stopped Brian Lam from jizzing on the servers yet? He's crafty... you might need to stake out the server room.

I want my money back.

@zukny: No.

Can anyone stop Brian Lam from jizzing on the servers? Oh, the humanity...

"These aren't the droids (sic) you're looking for. Move along. You serve your master well."

When will someone admit that this phone sucks? I know that Giz wants to get back together with their ex-boyfriend Steve, but really? Does it need to explode next to someone's head in Times Square? I mean, did the Pre have as many problems?

Brian Lam jizzed on the server while he was watching Steve's iPhone 4 intro for the 1245th time. Yeah, I said that. Bring on the banhammer you gutless bitches. Won't stop Brian from jizzing on your servers...

@Brian Sexton: I would prefer 100% of you reading the comments. Get it?

@FurySamurai72: Kind of like when you don't read the comments, and realize that I was joking. I think you (and others) are missing 30% of their life.

@m57: ...now who's joking? HA!

Hi Brian Lam is awesome. Reading his words is like pixels separated by troughs shimmering like canals at sunset. Or something.

There must be some mistake. Apple does not release products that don't enhance the user experience. Somebody call Brian Lam. He's a genius.

@00Red: I was still joking.

Great. This comes a day after the drop tests.

@conchster2: I was joking.

@Benguin: But full screen fills the whole image with stuff. The black bars are wasted space. I don't want 30% of my screen to be black... unless I get 30% off the price.

I doesn't matter what you write, Steve broke up with you. He isn't coming back. You need to move on. This is unhealthy.

@octasquid: HA!