We need a new thread: Unbelievably Dumb Kitchenette Commenters.

WHY ARE TURKEY AND VEGGIE BURGERS LABELED 'BURGERS' WHEN THEY'RE NOT MADE OF BEEF?!?! DURRRRRRRRRRRR

If I saw lamb-burger on the menu, I wouldn't assume it was a beef patty with a rack of lamb on top.

And I'll bet your toast is larger and of a higher quality due to it being avocado toast and not that cheapo stuff.

Scallop Burger
Beef Burger
Veggie Burger
Garden Burger
Tofu Burger
Turkey Burger

Seriously? That is the reality of having a digestive issue or actual food allergy. It's not fun but it's necessary so as not to DIE/have a bad reaction.

Wow, you just really want to make things the server's fault, don't you? Also, re-read the root beer story. He was TRYING to explain when she started shouting at him. So you have one story out of seven that would've been shortened (but wouldn't be as funny) if the server had asked a question or tried to clarify…

omg I had so many people so angry with me in an online fitness group for a comment I made saying alcohol had carbohydrates in it. They insisted it did not because it did not count for whatever Atkins/South Beach/whatever they were on. I didn't know whatever rules they were following, but good Lord, by definition,…

Toast Lady would NOT save bread

"You stupid bitch! It's Pinot Giorgio!"

The Whole Wheat Toast is the best, because it was so obvious once I read it fully, but at that same time I had no idea of the punchline until the end.

'I ASKED FOR WHOLE WHEAT FOUR TIMES' made me cackle so loudly it scared the cats. She must be married to Mr. Monogrammed Thermoses.

I am a working cook, as well as an instructor at a culinary school in Canada. I regularly reference BCO in class, trying to prepare my students for the unbelievable fuck-wittery waiting for them out in the 'real' world. These poor kids have no idea what awaits them...

The site is server-sympathy-oriented.

I got my first submission in that category in about five months this past week.

1) If you didn't have a union, you'd almost certainly have shittier wages and working conditions.
2) If you can't afford to tip when you eat out, cook for your own self. There's no excuse for being a cheap-ass piece of shit.

Like, how do they act at the doctor's office? Do they call their GP a cunt? Do they rail on the car wash register lady? Are they surly at the dog groomer's? Do they fuck with the grocery store cashier? Do they throw change at their gardeners? Snark at the college registrar?

Don't fuck with drag queens, and always look both ways before crossing the street. That concludes today's life lessons.