I love Spaceballs and everything by Mel Brooks.

But Spaceballs is funny and delightful!

2016 America: Where a 12-year old boy is shot and killed by the police for playing with a toy and it’s his fault because he should have “known” that people would see him as a threat, while a full-grown adult who rapes an unconscious woman and tries to flee should only have to endure a couple months of jail because…

Chicago. What godawful third-world backwater hellhole do you live in that they’re not?

It’s completely splitting hairs, rape is rape, but he only digitally penetrated her (as far as anyone knows)

Lest anyone too young to know might think the draft dodger angle is the biggest insult in this tweet, refusing to call him Ali, and instead insisting on calling him Clay was the racist dog whistle of choice back then. Racist whites refused to do so for years after.

I like you telling me about the people on twitter I refuse to follow. Keep doing it. Thanks.

The test pattern.

I hate to break it to you, but this mess is really all your daddy’s fault.

Yes, I wept. Thank you.

I came here to say, I’d vote for Michelle right now.

Her instagram account is full of pics from the commencement, highlighting students of color graduating today!

Wow. Her statement is so incredibly eloquent and spot -on. I really hope that she will find some sort of peace.

incl myself tbh

Lately I’ve been preferring the Veep part of my Sunday to the Silicon Valley part. SV is funny but sad/heartbreaking (except for Big Head who can’t stop failing upwards) and Veep is funny and mean. I can handle the mean more than the sad.

I suspect he made a pass and got rebuffed. His apology comes after realizing that not only will Keira Knightly never work with him again, neither will anyone else. Better to eat crow and keep your job.

That doesn’t explain him shitting on her (once only by implication) in three separate interviews, unprompted. It doesn’t explain why she is the one he lashed out at. It doesn’t explain why the comments were so gendered. It doesn’t explain the mystery that is Adam Levine. So, nah.

HE’S STILL NOT BAE YOU GUYZ

“making her the first self-made female billionaire”? Oprah (of Oprah fame) and Doris Fisher (GAP founder) were billionaire looooong before Elizabeth Holmes. I think you meant “youngest.”

Yeah these are the ones that stomp the shit out of snakes, good bird.