They went to the Aquarium by the CN Tower and he got her a stuffed shark?

I’m not so sure. At least a parking cone has a useful purpose.

Donald Trump, a parking cone with emotional issues

I don’t believe in the afterlife, but I want to for him and Gilda. He was such a sweet, funny man.

OMG seriously. It’s so rich that a man would have “hygienic” concerns about a woman’s attire. Like, first of all, you know nothing about female anatomy and what does/doesn’t create hygiene issues; second of all, 90% of men are 100% gross.

Hygiene, really?! The ways in which my body is policed by men (and other complicit women) using “hygiene” as an excuse are myriad, and yet a very large chunk of those men seem unable to flush, wash dishes, or keep their crevices fresh.

Real talk y’all, I tried one of those fit teas (I know, I know. Bad body image and weight gain coupled with long work hours that keep me from working out, I got desperate). They are poo teas. All you do is poo. I kept the leftover tea around in case I ever get seriously backed up. That can’t be healthy to drink all…

Gawker lives! I haven’t known what to do with myself in the mid-afternoon without news like this.

FYI this is what Donald Trump’s haircuts look like:

So happy that Ashley is bringing her...particular sensibilities over here to Deadspin/Concourse

JEAHL!