Why does dough almost always taste infinitely better than the thing it’s baked into?

They can pry my cookie dough from my cold, dead hands. I’ve been eating it my whole life and have no plans to stop now.

My 72 year old mother’s favorite movie is Good Burger. A woman’s heart is a deep ocean of secrets.

IDK what Englishmen even know about hot dogs.

Same. I thought they had gone rogue in hospital billing. 

Goddammit another misleading headline: totally thought this was going to be a Mr. Robot style hijack and am disappointed it’s just workaday folks doing good things for strangers. Borrrring!

PETA has officially jumped the shark

Woman’s pain gets in the way of man’s ego; man soldiers on. This story and more on News at 9.

Some of these probably smell like Miles Teller, so that’s even worse.

Y’all, if you haven’t given BOOM Comics a chance, DO IT. You will thank yourself for at least trying. This studio takes serious chances with their catalogue. Story and artistic choices are always next level.

This is New Jersey – a state that couldn’t tell the difference between a sentient Macy’s Parade Balloon and a governor. Twice!

It’s all about the clicks. 17 reasons why your kitchen may be killing you!

Yes! Glad InSight listened to my advice.

“If you take a bite out of it and then put it down, it will spill everywhere.”

So a hot dog isn’t a sandwich because you don’t know how to eat a hot dog? 

Come back next week for part two of the worst argument ever!

CGI-ing.

You’re right. I’m sure he did that Nike campaign gratis.
(And by the way, don’t worry: You don’t sound racist at all.)

$100.

“My life just got so much better!”

A. Because it’s really good.
B. Because it’s widely available.