The entire city of Cincinnati needs to sit in the timeout chair for a day. I don't care if they have to pee, sit there, you trashy turds.

CONFESSION TIME!!! I don’t get Chipotle. I think I’ve eaten there twice. It’s ok/good, but like... what are y’all on about?

• bananas

MOM!!?? Get off Kinja.

I lived for a while in a Jewish orthodox area where the women got around the rule about not showing their hair because it might tempt the menfolk by wearing the most fabulous wigs. It was technically correct. The best kind of correct.

Rock it, sister! I give you my blessing. *waves Muslim fashion wand*

Generally, that comes right after the ejaculation in this sequence of events.

Wait. What? How old are you?

Oh, thank goodness. That was horrifying.

I grew up in one of the poor neighborhoods where everybody had hardwood floors and dreamed of someday owning wall-to-wall carpeting.

AAAHHHH! BOOBS! MY ONLY WEAKNESS!!!

Kristen Wiig is funny but she doesn’t get enough credit for her dramatic range.

Congrats to all Lindas present.

I know we are all probably still traumatized by the Lindsey Lohan biopic, but I would watch the ever-loving hell out of Dallas Buyers Club 2: White Diamonds.

M’bear.

The judge’s sentence: “Wah wah wah wah wah wah wah”

Spongebob is seriously the best thing ever. I can’t believe people think it’s for kids.

True story - my mom and grandma have curly hair. My grandma had always gotten shit at jobs for her hair. When she finally got a union job, she wore a straight wig for her entire probationary period (a few months?) ad then the day after her probation was up, she wore her real hair to work and they couldn't say a damn…

Needs some cream and butter...

So to dig into the theology a little, that line in the Bible also says the husband’s body belongs to his wife. There’s nothing in that verse that suggests women don’t have equal say when it comes to what they do with their bodies together.