Needs some cream and butter...

So to dig into the theology a little, that line in the Bible also says the husband’s body belongs to his wife. There’s nothing in that verse that suggests women don’t have equal say when it comes to what they do with their bodies together.

Let’s look at all the silver linings here.

“She called you daddy for 18 years, now it’s our turn.”

Speaking of weird ads about bodily functions; I just saw this commercial...at least I think I did. It could have been an acid trip. But then I don’t do drugs. But it tops anything Thinx can throw out.

I went to a 2 million dollar wedding, bride’s dress alone cost over $100k. She threw up down the front of it at the reception.

Nope! I think they are low. Dude the hotel told her stalker she was staying there, and allowed him to stay in the room next to hers. That is some unforgivable shit right there. And there is no way to tell what effect this has had on her career because it can not ever be undone.

Any box of Lucky Charms is all mashmallow if you’re willing to do the work.

You mean... Netflix and Chill?

I'm forcing my husband to dress in a family theme to take our mini Pie trick or treating. He agreed on one condition: that he got to choose the theme. Scully and Mulder with a tiny alien. Sigh. He's already ordered the FBI badges.

So all the seamen were waiting for the Balls to drop

I... I was going to post something else, but I got distracted by this and now it’s all I can see, forever.

Don’t you think she looks tired?

Don’t you think Carly looks tired?

Ever heard of The Vortex? The owner is one of my favorite people, like, on the planet. Here are their policies, which includes this peach and many others:

I put bacon on my toast & jam, so I get the whole sweet and salty thing, but grape jelly on pizza just sounds horrible on all five sensory levels, even sound. I’d try it for Science, but I’m crazy like that.

I deliberately made it a hat so he could remove it and walk around headless, and yet for some reason he refused to do that :(

I don’t have much in the line of scars but I did stray from my original career path for mental health reasons. When people find this out about me I usually tell a non lie but not the total truth, and say that when the economy crashed my career went with it and hey what do you know? I love my current position and it…

I’ve done that! A friend was engaged for the second time. Her first engagement had ended about a year prior to this engagement. She confessed to me that she hated how people kept kidding her about “all” of her engagements. So when we were at a book club meeting, another woman there said “Oh wow, engaged again. Are you…