Oh, you like much younger women?  Cool story, bro.  You are not unique or bold for stating what most gross old creepers feel.  

Oh yeah, baby. Get ready for some very quiet, very horizontal, very careful, missionary style sexy times!!!!

Put your microwave on defrost. Put one or two wrapped sticks of butter in. Let it go for 5 seconds. Stop. Turn the butter sticks onto the next flat side. Microwave for 4 seconds. Stop. Flip them to the next side. 4 Seconds. Flip to the final side. 3 seconds. You are done. Perfectly soft, but not melted, butter sticks.

I rarely look at the amount of garlic that a recipe calls for. I just add the amount I want. I once instructed a step-child to add “an embarrassing amount of garlic” to a sauce they were helping me make. “Is this enough?” they asked, pointing to the pile they had chopped. “Are you embarrassed yet?”   “No?”  “Then keep…

I think I was in my 30s when, after I had gone through my stocking, I said “MUM!  I purposely haven’t bought any new razors in weeks, because there’s always a pack in my stocking!!!  WHAT HAPPENED??”  And she gasped and later that day went to the one drugstore still open on christmas and got me razors.  Yes, that is…

I LOVE LORDS AND LADLES!!! Oh Paul, you are the biggest baby of all of them!  Every time there was a weird ingredient, ohhhh the bellyaching!

Everyone form a queue to the left so that this douche can declare if you’re punk or not.  For they are the SOLE DECIDER of all things punk.  

Right?  I was like...you’re supposed to do this, otherwise the shells taste kind of stale?  Also, they break anyway, BRO.  But they’ll be toasty warm and crunch so whatever.  

Yes!  I told my bf we were both getting them there and now we have TWO gift cards.  I’m going to have him take his son there this coming weekend and we’ll get a third.  Then it’s RIBEYES FOR DINNER, EVERYONE!

Yes, just think of all those women who have previously come forward about sexual assault who are now rich and famous and not living in fear because they’ve been doxxed, ridiculed, threatened, etc.  All of them!  Just living the life of luxury now because of their false claims!  SO many!!!  

Duh.  

Yeah, I hate it when you go to Target and you see a rack of cute clamshells in the plus size section but then it turns out to be a rack of maternity clamshells.  :(

I found Atticus in the bushes outside my condo, a skin & bones five week old kitten. Most probably weaned early by one of the ferals that kept the rat population by our dumpsters under control. Something had tried to eat his tail, and the last inch of it was de-gloved. He needed some minor surgery and A LOT of food,…

I love this! I had to look up the stone because I never heard of that. And the hearts on the band are so sweet <3

There were people in my lab in grad school working on XP proteins and UV damage as well! I worked on MMR proteins, though.

Dear cat rescue,

Awwww, are your fee fees hurt????

Aren’t these the same right wing assholes who wail and scream OHHHH IT’S A MENTAL HEALTH ISSUE!!!! OBVIOUSLY!!!! every time some amped up dick with a grudge against women opens fire on a crowd? IS IT A PROBLEM OR NOT, GUYS, MAKE UP YOUR TINY, SHRIVELED MINDS.

Publix is my go-to every week shop, because I am in Atlanta. A couple years ago I moved to the norther ‘burbs of Atlanta, far away from my favorite place to shop, which is the Your Dekalb Farmer’s Market (which is not really a farmer’s market, but an international fresh market). THE best place for fresh produce, meat,…

Oh so you were robbed? They took your tv? Do you have any proof that you even owned a tv, sir? We should just take your word for it? People lie about owning tvs all the time, just for the attention and glory.