Thank you, fellow commenters, for bringing up the real story here. Now Samer, will you be reaching out to Tony Hawk for comment?

BANDAIDS DONT FIX BULLET HOLES

Excuse me sir, but you can make a whale fart. 🐳💨

We have killed him.

...or that I am a woman who played basketball, which I am?

There’s a difference between making fun of the WNBA and all of women’s sports. You couldn’t pay me to watch a WNBA game, but I love the women’s World Cup.

Fake lemon is the WORST.

I would rather be a barrister. That’s why we call ourselves attorneys and not lawyers.

I DO NOT UNDERSTAND IRONY OR THAT YOU ARE A DS WRITER SO YOU THEREFORE ARE AN IDIOT.

I SECOND THE MOTION

Oh it's coming. You know it is.

*wipes away a tear* poetry, my dear Margary. Absolute poetry.

He seemed to make it to the other side. HE MADE IT, OKAY DEADSPIN? HE MADE IT BECAUSE I’M NOT OKAY WHIT HIM NOT MAKING IT.

I thought only Bill Simmons had one of those?

Oh my god FUCK the twins. I don’t know what it says about me that I loved the original three and see the twins and go “GOLD DIGGING WHOOOOORES” (and I have nothing against gold digging whores!!! I respect them, and would be one if I had the body for it maybe).

...and because your last name is the same as her hometown?

I own seasons on DVD. THAT’S HOW MUCH I LOVE THAT SHOW.

Generous.

As soon as we tell ourselves NOT to do something, that means we’re obviously going to do it. Y U SO MEAN, BRAIN?

*cough* Boston UNIVERSITY terriers. They would not appreciate the mixup. (With that said, GO BC EAGLES).