That is clearly a hoverfly with an erection.

That’s because going to heaven has no resale value.

The assholes got to you before you finished typing your first post? Damn, they’re efficient.

A) What is the point of starting with a “1-” if there is no “2-”?

Treat our police officers with the respect that their positions deserve...

You think they deserve tombstones? Sell their corpses to a necrophiliac on Craigslist.

The first thing any Army recruiter will tell you is to never believe an Army recruiter. Unless they’re recruiting you. Then they’ll only tell you that after you sign.

Wyld Stallyns won because Primus didn’t bring Tom Waits.

False. Knees are actually leg knuckles. All joints are easily replaced by knuckles, as evidenced by this scientific reconstruction.

Look at him like you would one of your children. Tell him he’s a damned adult and he needs to get his shit together and move away.

It’s illegal for foreigners to get involved in US elections. Corporations are apparently people now. So shouldn’t it be illegal for any corporation that is headquartered in another (more tax-sheltery) country to get involved in an election?

...just because you guys continue to ask the same question over and over and over again doesn’t mean we that have to keep coming up with new things to say.

I guess they put up a poster saying “we earn more than you”.

I marked my boss as spam.

Lego is for hacks. Real artists work in Lite Brite.

And here I was thinking it was a clever girl.

It might be “symbiote to symbiote”, but it’s still Spider-Man vs frickin’ Thanos. All you’ve done is take away an advantage he didn’t need in the first place.