Let’s be honest: other political candidates also have supporters who are good people.

Steve Bannon doesn’t make love. Steve Bannon fumbles to cram his flaccid pecker into you (managing only to bump you repeatedly with his gut), and then storms off, frustrated, screaming about how impotence is a jewish plot for world domination.

They are labeled. You have to read your appendix.

Why? Are the Dudleys coming, too?

It was compared to Bombad Racing.

That’s what they want you to think.

First it was South Carolina. Then it was Texas. I had Alabama third to complete the trifecta. I should have known it would be Kentucky.

Well, it’s certainly more concise than “being a stupid asshole”.

This is what happens when you just try to make your tractor sound more “tractor-y”.

Here’s my favorite Irish proverb:

I once had a non-declawed cat that bit. If you fell asleep while petting the little a-hole, she’d bite the tip of your nose. Hard. Whether she was hoping you’d wake up and start petting again or she was just pissed that you didn’t finish the job is unknown.

Poo in the future

Just be careful about which criminals you mimic.

Around the same age, I got an A on a poem where I rhymed ‘hideous’ and ‘shittiest’. Some teacher’s don’t mind.

You corksoaker.

We need to go back to the old days, where people just wished for the misfortune of people they have never met or known based on bits and pieces of gossip overheard at the neighbor’s barbecue.