He’s literally off the charts (well, in 2016 and 17 so far at least...)

Have we not yet renamed Florida to South Washington, DC?

This doesn’t even make logical sense — the CONFERENCE ITSELF IS BASED IN NORTH CAROLINA!

This is another quality Gortat interaction:

Gortat interacting with trolls is one of my favorite random things to scroll through on Twitter.

I absolutely cannot. It’s pretty amazing.

You hate to be a highlight truther and yet here we are.

All you accomplish is you make a United security persons life worse and your dignity harmed.

In his official MLB picture he looks a lot like Eddie Harris, so I can only assume he drank Jobu’s rum before the game.

Perfection

Don’t Tell Melania pretty ripe for the picking.

Goddamn it. I got really mad when I got to the end of this.

Lmao u mad?

This is the Magic. They’re more likely to get Darko Milicic for Aaron Gordon than Dario Saric.  

Nice.

Terrifying

Eh, I feel no shame as a Wizards fan — for one, I’m a Wizards fan! Do you have any idea how often that’s been met with one of those blank “why tho” looks over the years? So many. I’ve lost count. This franchise has basically teflon coated me from feeling embarrassed about it.

This is the kind of tanking I want to see. Just pick a dude and say “you’re taking all of our shots tonight”. It’ll often be trash but sometimes you make a little history. Worth it.

Is that better than El Pollo Rico in Arlington? It can’t possibly be.

“Their least horrendous backups for like three months were Trey Burke and Jason Smith” is not exactly a ringing endorsement for Trey Burke, but is also technically true.