I resolve to face facts and let this all-teal and mostly rust-free behemoth become someone else’s project. There’s nothing sadder than a Bronco in a garage. Plus, the boss wants the spot for her last year’s resolution...

Top's never been off on this one to the best of my knowledge. It's a ton of screws and it's really heavy. 

This is the moment in the concert where the lead singer mentions your town: “Yo! Like, I totally OWN of those!”

Counterpoint.

I think the less we discuss body panel availability, the better. Because I’m still very much enamoured of ours and I’m riding that wave of denial. Thinking about a second one, too...

Smoked Pearl over black cloth. Because only a pimp from a cheap New Orleans cathouse would drive a current-gen Regal with leather.

Not true, for me at least, but star for the spit-take. 

I got the abused 2005 Forester when the wife moved up to this. We’re totally happy with it as a DD for a family of 4. And I’m looking for deals for one of my own now. Yep, gonna be THAT guy.

I contend my 5-speed 1990 Shadow was a stick-shifted k-car. They were pretty common in that form in the day...and absolutely awful to own.

Here’s mine, David. The tailgate has cancer, but that’s it. She has a few issues, but rust isn’t one of them. And it’s about to be for sale, if you’re looking to branch out on the tree of old truck misery. RWP IKWIH!

Dangit.

Will it come in real? If not, doubt I’ll make the upgrade.

Since you talked us into one, looking forward to hearing how the Regal’s unexpected mountain of torque does with the tow.

Not brown.

It's not aftermarket. GM gives the US version a nudge up from the Opel version. 

30 @ 75 four-up plus luggage and the dog. Using premium.

Nope. Doesn’t suck. Teens in the back, sunroof top, digging the scene with a gangsta lean.

It’s a 3/4 inch lift. Frankly, I wouldn’t want ours any lower. Still sexy in my eyes.

The correct answer is Buick Regal TourX. Ours luckily doesn't have leather, but it's really not the interior for a family of four and a dog. That piano black console is not going to age well. Hard plastic hits skin. And it is entirely possible to spec one without a single rear cupholder. What do I win?

Saw my first one this weekend. I'd have one if it had the same drivetrain as our TourX.