They'll do it until they're satisfied, but their user base's frustration will in no way play into that. They are quick to remind us that commenters are only a very small portion of their overall readership.

Most awesome summary I've read thus far. (And I was only able to read it thanks to the BlueTunic plug-in that reverts comments back to an easily readable form.)

All that matters is that BlueTunic's browser plug-in that un-fucks up your comments still works. Everyone who doesn't have it needs to get it now.

"Mighty god-rod."

It's the ocean of rage within me that makes me this way.

Dogs are degenerate, disgusting little bundles of joy.

So when my dog gets into the garbage and chews up my used tampons, she's not just being disgusting, she's also committing a desecration? Good to know. Next time, she'll get an extra whap on the nose with a rolled up newspaper. "Bad baby-eating dog! Bad, bad, bad!"

"Unmarried Christians stick bars of soap up their hoohas and sew them shut to keep their slutholes clean until god blesses them with the purifying force of a husband's penis."

Oh jesus fucking christ, the batshit, it burns, it burns! Get it off of me!

I'm just gonna leave this here.

I worry about the hygienic consequences of all of these Republicans trying to stick their heads up my vagina after storing them in their asses. It's a surefire recipe for a bladder infection.

Ohhhh! He meant false rapes! Lord knows, there are so many of those, after all. I try to lie about being raped at least three times before breakfast every day. I find it invigorating to deal with the enormous and sometimes catastrophic repercussions of lying about being raped. It's fun, yo! You should try it!

If I ever have a hysterectomy, I'm making the doctors let me keep my uterus so I can throw it at a Republican's head.

Exactly! In fact, I think you've hit on something here.

They demonstrate that conflict in everything they do. Pro-guns, pro-war, anti-social safety net, anti-quality health care, anti-equal rights. As far as the GOP is concerned, people's lives are only of value while they're still buns in the oven. Once they pop out and become actual, you know, people, they can get…

Ohhhh, good point! I hadn't thought of that. As no one has put a gun to my head, inserted their fingers into my eye sockets against my will, and forcibly moved my eyeballs in a rolling motion, I suppose it wasn't legitimate. Darn it!

Allow me a moment to collect my eyeballs from the floor, which have fallen out of my head because I rolled them too hard.

That's right. Good girls have vagina dentata. Their bodies really do come equipped with a way to "shut that whole thing down." If your vagina is as toothless as the mouth of an 87 year old meth addict who's never met a toothbrush, it's because you're a bad girl. And bad girls can't be raped anyway, because they exist…

Guys, guys, calm down. No need to get worked up. This was all actually a clumsy effort to advertise for his new vagina dentata inserts business. He's going to sell a variety of kinds: porcelain, steel, glow in the dark. I hear you can even get dentata that look like they're wearing a grill.

Perfect.