They don't call it "The Happiest Place on Earth" for no reason. Disney staff are 100% dedicated to customer service. I read somewhere that any ice cream vendor can give free ice cream to a crying child, no questions asked.

My students come up to me every once in a while and are like "I wrote this poem about love and the meaning of life and my dog, would you like to read it?"

I try to explain this to my students all the time.

I haven't seen it, but Jamie Dornan is excellent in The Fall. I have to wonder if he was just checked out of it. Like "Got my money, I'm done."

Kara, oh high judge of shade, I need a ruling!

A friend of mine worked on this film and he said that Reese Witherspoon is super sweet and Sofia Vergara is actually her character from Modern Family.

High school teacher. I literally had a kid scream at me yesterday for asking him to turn in his homework.

I tip 20% because it's easier to do the math than 15%.

A teacher I work with quit half way through the year last year, and every time she comes up in conversation my response is "I went to Mellow Mushroom with her and she didn't tip anything so I just assume she's a shitty person all-around."

The ONLY time its appropriate is if there are children involved and then you better do it like Susan Sarandon and Julia Roberts in Stepmom otherwise fuck off.

I don't think so. Doesn't it leave a scar?(I am not an expert in childhood immunizations)

That's what's really scary though, isn't it?

Wait, what's a Sandy Hook truther?

An unnamed inside source I spoke to (my partner) suggested that Kanye West did this and then told me not to call him at work anymore unless it was an emergency.

I live in NOLA, and Gayle's actually pretty well respected. The Benson kids on the other hand....

I got pregnant in my own house and I'll do what I damn well please with said pregnancy!

Well, men have penises, but they were once inside of wombs, so clearly they have far more perspective than women who have only ever had vaginas and therefore can't possibly see the other side of the argument.

Kristen Wiig would be a FABULOUS Joni Ernst.

I think it could honestly be either interpretation.

Nothing- but when we were alone and fought we couldn't share dinner (have to cook our own) or both watch tv on the big tv in the living room (have to watch in mom's room) or take the one car to get ice cream (every stays home).