“DO.....YOU.....SPEAK....ENGLISH?!”

yes, hopefully the FBI can afford to hire another agent so they can focus on more than one case at a time

Properly uses all caps, +1

Credentialed! Well, that clears Deadspin.

Thank God the FBI was able to solve this crime.

The Wall just got 12 feet taller

Sounds like a Telemundo revenge fantasy to me.

If we can’t beat a competitor’s price by 10%, we’ll give you the car for free.

Your Mom is a rapidly depreciating asset.

I saw a Land Rover dealer webpage about all the tax benefits of the Range Rover’s rapid depreciation.

The Earl of Gaga himself?!?!

NEXT!

Instead of “Rookie”, I thought the headline was going to say “An Actual Dolphin” and I wouldn’t have been any more or less surprised.

Highlight truther of the day: did he even tag the runner before he reached second base? Seems like his glove was on the outfield side of the runner’s leg.

No pocket square and the second button fastened? It amazes me when men don’t know how to wear suits properly. The rules really aren’t that hard to follow.

Man, imagine these guys announcing Cavs-Rockets. “Harden for three—no good. Ah, he couldn’ care less, he’s having a ball, loves life and exercise.” “Out of bounds, they’re reviewing to see who touched it last. Doesn’t really matter, does it.”

Or be this guy.

They’re getting the fuck out of the dugout since apparently that’s where the jackass is aiming with the bat flip.

my kids cant even spell PS4.

Five?!?! Fu-uck. I just texted my wife and told her to throw the PS4 in the fireplace. Those kids are hitting the books when I get home.