What if we don't know how to read?

Where's the Balls with an emergency Cultural Oddsmaker column?

Why hasn't Piniella bought out the Wiener Circle yet? This seems like a natural choice.

@Old No.7: Jean-Claude Grand-Pierre is gonna jack you up.

@RectumDamnNearKilledEm: no, it wouldn't have.

What if Satan gave Jim Gray a taco?

@SUSS—: For a minute, I thought Rob wrote a column in tribute to 2 Live Crew.

no line waiting to get in? doesn't look that super to me.

7. swiss army knife

@The Man with No Name: Like NWA say, "don't matter, just don't bite it."

10 years from now when some lucky timorese lady stupidly says yes to me, i'll make damn sure it's on a february weekend with no FA Cup tilts.

so wait, is he the most "now"?

clinique has products that can deal with those bags under the eyes.

@Tuffy: yeah, med school's expensive.

@Hit Bull Win Steak: Toledo wants in on this.

Who wears that to the beach, seriously?

PC Load Letter? What the fuck does that mean?

phil spector is not impressed.

it might have something to do with the fact that indianapolis is the wonder bread of midwestern cities. even columbus thinks it's boring.

@belowthefold: this includes basketball, i presume.