It makes perfect sense. Holding office as a Republican would allow him to remain a virgin and fuck women at the same time.

"Whatever. I always turn my secrete into a gag."

+1

This is an excellent joke. +1

five seconds before dozing off

+1

I followed up on this. Turns out it's bullshit. You have to do a mail-in rebate.

- Jason Whitlock

DUAN DUAN

In Soviet Russia, they took a lot of pride in sport and had excellent facilities and trainers so this probably wouldn't have happened.

Isaac Batters Gulf Coast

Federer: [throws sock on Murray] Hey, Andy, check it out! It's Jack Sock!

I like this a whole bunch.

Awesome.

Ugh, what's the joke I want to make about the Broncos and John Elway and Peyton Manning? It's right on the tip of my giant fucking shiny forehead.

Might have to get in on that. I've been trying to fail out of grad school for a while now.

Makes sense. The phrase "Oasis classic" has about the same level of cultural relevance as "Mets championship."

Girl in green shirt behind old man: Daddy, look! That guy wants to do the same thing to Derek Jeter that I did so you could get your foul ball autographed!

Bunch of dildos. (Used to be just one dildo, but 100 years is plenty of time for repeated dildosis.)

Ha!