I had a LOT of fun in my twenties, then had two kids so I guess this represents my vag to crazy, possibly fictitious god sandwich lady.

And - and! - then he gave a speech at the United State of Women Summit where he called himself a feminist, quoted Shirley Chisholm and talked about the insane double standard women and girls of color face on regard to assertion, being called “angry”, etc!! And slut shaming was in there too! Senior Year Obama has HAD…

I love every woman this article is written about. GET READY TO GET REKT TRUMP.

Your horse is definitely Miss Congeniality, but Frederick is Miss Universe. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

There is no right way to girl. I sometimes just take eyeliner so I can keep my raccoon mask on fleek.

Ah yes, shall we just return to the mashed potato and twist to satisfy your generational needs?

The same could be said for babies. But alas, here I am, cutting this banana into a million different bites.

Why does it need a person to cut up the fruit? Isn’t that what the claws and teeth are for?

My favorite part of that whole dumpster fire of a speech was where he was like “They call me ‘plainspoken’ but I’m smart. I went to an Ivy league school! Have you ever heard of it? The Wharton School of Finance!” and the whole place just went DEAD. (That’s usually a big applause line for him in his stump speech,…