Corruption in political office should be considered the worst crime a person can commit. Worse than rape. Worse than murder. It should carry a mandatory death penalty.

Could you PLEASE stop using the term “queer” to refer to members of the gay, lesbian and bisexual community. Some of us find it HIGHLY offensive. If some wants to refer to themselves as “queer” that’s their business, but how dare you refer to me that way? The term is disgusting. Stop using it. PLEASE.

Charisma? Ted Cruz has the charisma of a used condom.

Speaking of Hulks...

I think I know exactly how this clusterfuck come about:

This woman looks like she’s being forced to do this tour at gun-point.

“The fetuses are not for sale.”

Hmm? But what about the lesbians?

So what about inter-sex students with intermediate genitalia? Or students who posses neither XX or XY sex chromosomes (e.g. XXY, XXYY, XYY, XXX). Shall we create separate bathrooms and changerooms for all the myriad of possibilities?

If Anton Scalia hadn’t just died I might have considered sending him some of these. After all, what do you get for an asshole who already has everything? Another asshole of course.

Well he did marry a woman who manages to be both mother and whore at the same time. It’s a kind of talent I guess. It certainly seems to be working out for her anyway. But I give her like twelve months max before she dumps him for someone who isn’t $53 million in debt. And who probably doesn’t make crappy (and…

Only now you get worried? The guy’s been a raving lunatic for years.

So basically Shkreli is just making shit up and screaming it into the void now? With all the free time he now has he should probably consider taking up a hobby. Might I suggest macrame? Wait, is that the one where you glue pieces of macaroni to card stock to make pictures of your dog that look like George W. Bush…

Kanye: No one’s leaving and I’m going to keep playing the game’s trailer until I feel that you’re all sufficiently impressed.

So I can dress up as Nicki Minaj because she wears a fuck-ton of makeup? Somehow I don’t think that would fly.

I’m deeply offended by the white face on display here, along with the general cultural appropriation of European and Asian culture by black people. And before you say thing, yes, it is the same. EXACTLY the same. Stop dressing like white people and imitating our culture. Put down that knife and fork you’re using. You…

Because Star Wars is just (bad) fantasy set in space and not actually science fiction?

“She picked up a necklace that had fallen to the ground (the necklace belonged to one of the victims). She then ran home and called 911.”

From Kristin’s Facebook post: “This has ruined his belief in Santa.”

The resulting sketch was the kind of humor that’s marked Fey and Poehler’s careers...