I can’t GIVE this enough stars. Fuck Dorit. And fuck PK. Jesus: use your name, you Vogon-looking disgusting creep-in-a-white suit.

Oh FFS 🤦‍♀️

Maybe it’s just because I’m Australian, but I’ve got no fucken idea who he is. Oh, now I do. Now he’s that white boy who cried because life happens 😐

That is gold. It has to be satire. Her dad, Jim?

That video is beautiful. That is a family being a family and there is a lot of love there. Their kids are adorable.

No. I like 3 year old children.

There must be a lot of people thinking of Tim Minchin songs RN.

I am shunned by so many of my friends for this reason. But I can’t even fucken stand her in an ironic way.

Oh bravo 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

Hmm: I’ve spent my career teaching in all boys schools. I’m about to leave my school of 14 years. We go from year 4 to year 12. All boys. So 8 year-olds to 18 year-olds 😐.

I hear you. I teach high school (which in Australia is Year 7 through to 12). Bring on the combat allowance.

BAHAHAHAAAAAAAA! I just coughed up 2016 I laughed so hard!!

She is MY new hero.

The forced rhyming, the uneven meter: the PRIDE and BRIDE 😳 Jesus God; what I wouldn’t have given to have been at that wedding, been ME and been even just ONE sheet to the wind as she was reciting it.

Oh you’ll be fine. You literally have the best year of your life coming up (27: I’m serious. It’s the greatest age you will ever be. It’s like the pinnacle. I loved it) so shut your mouth.

Shut up. I hate you. I’m officially one month into my forties.

Yep

Yeah the Four Seasons thing is odd, but she was pregnant with their first baby. That was NBD.

Yeah, Bec Hewitt is best known for being on a soap opera called ‘Home and Away’ set in the fictional town of ‘Summer Bay’ (which is a shit town by the way - everyone is always having to pop up the road to ‘Yabby Creek’ which has EVERYTHING, apparently including a university -I’m dying “oh you went to Cambridge? I got…

Wow. Sorry about that. Can I offer you a piece of the Arc De Triomphe, freshly chipped off as a consolation? Perhaps you prefer a slice of the Louvre? A scraping of the obelisk? 😬