I'm looking forward to when you choke on a horse cock and die, and all of the other ghosts make fun of you.

The anniversary of my dad's death is coming up, and you asked for stories of "slight hauntings," so I think I'll share this story again:

I think we can all agree that bathroom ghosts are the worst ghosts. Pervy little bastards.

I absolutely think it's important to call Jezebel out when it does inappropriate crap. I didn't say it wasn't. It just bothers me when people express the belief that this is a feminist or safe place, because it's not. Commenters who need a feminist or safe place can get really burned here. Am I an asshole for…

Sorry. I definitely didn't mean to sound like I'm lecturing you. I get frustrated when I see commenters here who think this is a safe or truly pro-woman place. I always have an urge to shout, "RUN! RUN AWAY AS FAST AS YOU CAN!"

Jezebel is NOT a feminist publication.

If you don't mind humor with a bit of an edge, you are also extremely welcome in Clashtalk any time. That was impressive. A fierce Julia Sugarbaker moment if ever I've seen one. If you have a Twitter account, I would follow it with joy.

Daaamn. You burned this mother down.

Oh, Jezebel, if you didn't do something ugly and nasty at least once a week, I wouldn't be able to recognize you. Thank you for your consistency.

I worry that you are under the impression that the more gifs you post, the funnier your comment gets. Please let me disabuse you of that notion. It's dreadfully ineffective at conveying anything, and most of the time, it breaks Kinja.

Where can I buy my husband underwear with a sparkly crotch like that? I need it for science reasons.

I have totally done the "I love you" thing at the end of a message. Similarly, once, I was on an elevator with a new boss, and when we reached my floor and I got off, I turned to her and said, "Night night!" instead of goodbye.

What happened next is that his mom said, "Was that your tongue?" He shouted, "NO!" and ran away, and later blamed the whole fiasco on me.

This is somewhat off-topic, but this article reminds me of a story.

I know! It's, like, sooooo, like, weird that different situations are different.

I don't need yet another reason to shout QUIT JUDGING ME at inanimate objects.

I got all my shiz hanging out there.

My hair's blowing back like I'm in a music video thanks to the whooosh caused by your point flying over so many commenters' heads.

She's one of my very favorite crackpots.

Someone gave my husband band aids and wet wipes for Christmas. Last year, the same person gave him a travel-sized Axe Body Spray. I think he wins the Bad Gift Award.