Beyoncé is just going through that thing where she’s maybe just a little jetlagged and isn’t getting more than two full hours asleep at a go in their bed and Jay Z is usually her snuggle bumpkin but the bedroom’s been in the same configuration for two and a half years and she needs to rearrange it in order to be able…

I'm so sorry! That's horrible! I'll be thinking of you.

I’ve been suicidal. I’ve lost loved ones to suicide. But the last six months have seen me almost unapologetically thinking at total strangers, “I hope you fucking kills yourself, because the world will literally be a better, safer place without you in it.” I’m scared because it’s taking me longer and longer to…

Sentient?

Why do people do that? I especially love the “look at what a good Christian I am!” sentiment that accompanies many of them. Um, no? You’re defying the word of Christ by posting your good deeds. Aside from being self-aggrandizing, that kind of behavior turns other people who have less power into props. It’s wholly…

But of course. I took a picture of myself all puffy-faced and watch-dented after a nap the other day and some guy tried to tell me I shouldn’t feel bad because I looked great! No, I didn’t. I looked like a hot mess and it was hilarious. Bitches should be jealous of my confidence and self-deprecating humor, not my…

Woah. That sounds so disturbing. I'm kind of freaked out about falling asleep in front of strangers. So did you just stay home and rest?

Um, no. It wasn't really a thing where I come from. Doesn't it come with complimentary sore throat and aches?

I find light boxes are shit and do absolute jack, but having an Aerogarden and then putting full spectrum lights into my bathroom where I have all my other plants seems to really have perked me up. Basically, having green growing things makes it possible for me to feel any hope at all. They can be cheaply procured on…

No...? Poland seems like it does quite nicely for itself, so I’m assuming it’s not that.

I can’t stand the idea of a doctor I’ve never met with his (HIS) hands anywhere near me when I’m naked and lying down. After a certain amount of sexual abuse/assault (that is, any at all), I think I’m allowed to say I’m not leaving access to my genitals up to chance or strangers. Like, I could see natural birth…

With my mom and half sister both having emergency c sections for their first births, I figure the odds are strong enough that I’d have one that I’d rather go through major abdominal surgery after a good night’s sleep, not after multiple days of active labor. Somehow, it strikes me as not shocking at all that there are…

Make this up for later/next time:

Waaaaah! But my GP is so stooooooopit! She’s nice and is great about my no-touchy-PTSD stuff, but I’m betting five bucks and half a pumpkin pie that her answer is going to be go off my psych meds and do physical therapy. That was her solution to a tendon problem that was only resolvable through surgery. But so nice!…

As someone who decided at an early age that a c-section was for me, I’ve been grilling my RN-mom and two time CS haver and this is what she’s said:

My mom needs this! Fuck, I need this, but I live in a condo teeming with rich old white republicans with decorating tastes that tend more toward “god’s waiting room”, so I’ll have to visit it at my parents’ home.

Guys, help! My sleep schedule is fucked the fuck up. I’m sleeping 16-20 hours a day most days and not at all the rest. I’m even napping, which i haven’t done since i was a baby, barring illness.

My partner’s parents bought one of these for their teenaged son in I think each of their homes. This was when I knew I’d never ask them for parenting advice. I'd sooner ask my friend what she thought, based on her two years of cat ownership.

All the things! I took my chicken out of its brine this afternoon and now it’s drying in the fridge with a fine dusting of baking powder to crisp up the skin. Yesterday I made potato salad (it’s my eat-while-I-cook food and then I bulk up whatever’s left for TG dinner), gravy, cranberry sauce, cheese mixture for my…

I personally don’t mind comments on an attribute of the clothing (cool color, intricate embroidery) but the majority of men seem completely oblivious to the nuance that takes a comment from mild to disgusting. Embroidery on the cuffs, fine, but if you comment on on the stitching on the neckline of a garment, you’re…