Yes! You’ve caught me! Now I’ll have to have Soapsassins sent after you to protect The Conspiracy!

Kara’s ability to herself to use shade while writing Shade Court will be covered in the 300-level course.

You’re close.

You’re one of those people who showers twice a day aren’t you?

I use a white bath towel and it has never once come away dirty from my legs.

I would love, love, love to see you do a shade court entirely dedicated to Obama’s final UN speech. It was like a shade buffet. It was heavenly.

Shade for days

What you’re missing is by Obama telling Colbert

I love Shade Court and I love Michelle Obama. I love them both so much that I had a dream last night that I won an evening with Michelle at the White House and she was throwing shade in my dream. Also, we were served milk and cookies by Betty White. When my brain gets it right, it gets it right. I’ll be living off…

Judge Brown:

and you know she can’t stand on pointe shoes...she’s holding herself up...naomi is just fucking walking around in those shoes!

The Naomi shade is the closest I’ve ever seen to the actual definition of shade. Perfection.

How did you lose your leg hair? Did you simply misplace it somewhere, or did you hire someone to take care of it?

Using a fresh towel/washcloth every time is my dream life, but I live in a drought and washing that many towels would use a lot of water so I just am going to live vicariously through you.

Well...I shower every day. And I shave every three days. So it doesn’t seem necessary to lather up my legs every time. In fact, my skin would probably be chapped and dry if I did that.

yeah, but i shave my legs, which is really just v. meticulous washing

Do you eat off your legs?

do you routinely roll around in raw chicken juice?

It depends but I think yes, given that enough water has run down to make it look clean again (so no buts or visible goo). I’m gross, I know it.

I don’t know how to vote. Shaving is basically washing, yes?