This woman needs to lose custody of her minor children. No joke, no exaggeration.

This is a horrible comment, you are a horrible person, and I feel horrible for laughing.

What about a serial killer of Ayn Rand fans?

Um...no...being a serial killer is number two on my list of deal breakers...I'm terribly picky, you see.

You should probably be allowed to retire

If I could get 21 days paid leave just for going to Dallas, I would be on the first fucking flight.

Robin Thicke, is that you?

"LOVE SHACK," BAAAYBEEEE (sung just like that)

How would they like an image of a dead, bloodied woman and a twisted coathanger on the floor next to that one, with the phrase, "When abortion was not safe, legal and accessible, women died. Save women's lives - protect choice."

To me, it looks like he killed 2 elderly retirees, burned all of their furniture for warmth, and left the knick-knacks up

You know, I think I am more offended by the expectation of an unpaid maid than an unpaid sex slave. Cause there is a small chance the sex slave might derive pleasure from it. There is zero chance anyone will get off cleaning for no pay.

How uncomfortable! I'm currently on an unfamiliar campus and still haven't found the good poop bathrooms and it's been a little rough. The other day I had to go and I walked into a bathroom with half a dozen sorority girls just hanging out changing into weird matching shirts and primping. Literally the least…

One time I was pooping before a shower and I had already taken off all of my clothes. So I was sitting on the toilet, naked, and my boyfriend barges in because he just got stung by a bunch of bees and needed the first aid stuff that was in the bathroom. That's reason enough to always remained as clothed as possible…

Ladies, we're not supposed to be putting hamburger up there.

I have removed a lot of meat from my diet recently. I will continue to do so.

I have read that dogs are deterrents for burglars. Why break into the house with the barking, possibly vicious dog when they can break into their neighbor's house with no dog?

better to tell them why they're sheltering so they realize it's not a joke or a game though right?

That's why I insisted that my wife have a completely natural, drug-free c-section.

DONT GET MARRIED IN VEGAS, BRO! IT WONT LAST!

Those raging ones in CA, that's all on me.