I wish we’d stop calling Republicans “capitalists.” They’re not.

Though I’m super sad for your 11 year old self (who denies children those amazing orange slices and chewy granola bars?!), this is actually worse! This is worse than being mean to a bunch of 6th graders about playing a soccer game that doesn’t matter. You didn’t sign a soccer contract in which you were guaranteed 5…

I wouldn’t say that’s unpopular. I would say that’s exactly right.

Hahahahahhaahhaaha.

I had a similar thing happen, where we had people offering to help but would not tell us how much they were thinking, and it was very exhausting being like, “Does that mean like...$500? Or like $10,000?” So I made an Excel sheet with every single cost I could think of (I know there will be a lot of surprises, but I…

Oh I agree! I think people may have thought that I was calling Australia ridiculous. But no, not at all. I just think it’s unbelievable that the university thought it was enough of a threat to make them take a class— and that a loud part of our public thinks everything is a-okay.

Ummm...and the correct response is to clarify where exactly in the northwest he means?!?!?!?!?!

I just want to point out that we both just replied very similarly but about totally different people.

Yeah, but she was a Democrat and if she just didn’t hate guns and freedom so much, and was also armed with an assault rifle during that speech, she and others totally wouldn’t have gotten shot.

My friends and I have talked about how we all have contingency plans in our heads if this were to happen in our schools or workplaces.

I’m weeping right now, just to let you know.

Ok to be real, that’s often me at a baseball game, just because of how bored I am.

I’m so tired of people wanting to raze my city. Most of us are actual decent citizens living in a city that affords us no representation. The idiots who are “messing up Washington” barely spend any time here or know anything about us. That’s enough without Huckabee and the rest talking about blowing us up.

Yeah actually I had some friends visit once from the Midwest and I took them to happy hour here...They were actually appalled. “You pay THIS MUCH for drinks!?”

There is a “Community” episode about this, only it’s an app so you can grade people on the go.

The imperfect victim argument...works for racism, works for sexism, works for everything!

The problem is that this is impossible to administer. Who is going to approve the licenses? What if we get a Kim Davis situation going on with people refusing to approve poor people/gay people/minorities/unmarried people...It goes on and on.

At least five of the things on that list are absolutely hilarious to me/something that the government would police more.

Wow, you know you must be in the right when you have leap around with such amazing verbal gymnastics to make your point.

Late now (though I wish Jezebel/The Slot would do a piece on this?), but the Times has a “Room for Debate” today that is perfect for this. “Is Carly Fiorina a Feminist?” it asks.