I am embarrassed that I know this (thanks Pinterest/Tumblr), but apparently "The Jungle Book" is one of Mr. Hiddleston's favorites (the Disney version at least—I don't know about preferences for the original story). Anyway... they've got to find a place for That Voice in one of these, right?

If I have kids, I still want to maintain a sexual relationship with my husband and having a bed full of children and calling my vagina my "chichi" would probably impact that pretty strongly. Also, rolling around in my children's body fluids, since they are sleeping in my bed without diapers before being potty…

"though it's less common among kind mamas, some women experience the blues after giving birth"

He's not a pedophile. He's had multiple relationships with adult women.

One of my husband's co-workers wore a white summer dress to our outdoors wedding. ALL WHITE. I gave that woman my best evil side-eye many times during the reception and have never forgiven her.

Tough to say. I am not sure if he counts the black one.

She hasn't put out a sex tape in forever. Kids today..... so lazy

North West is the cutest baby in the world, other than my own babies, of course! =^_^=

You're not trying to help, are you?

Try not to think of it as a butthole. Just pretend it's the Sun...a brown, stinky Sun.

When he was half asleep the other night The Husband was sharing with me a made up sexual fantasy about passengers on a plane "getting erotically lost". I asked him what that would look like.

I once led a class discussion on a chapter of a book I totally forgot to read (along with everyone else, I guess, because no one else was participating) just making assumptions based on the questions that my professor was asking. At the end of class, she complimented me for obviously being the only person who'd done…

Exactly. And by, I don't lurk on Reddit all day, I mean haven't been on Reddit ever. At all.

Not everyone lurks on Reddit all day. Some of us lurk on Jezebel all day.

I'LL SHOW YOU!!!!

thank-you. I'm white and I found that comment completely offensive.

Teddy bear, teddy bear

It looks like he has a spare penis on his knee.

Then he gets arrested because she's screaming BORK BORK BORK too loudly.