Next, “Fish on Fridays”.

Meanwhile, Connie Chung successfully filed to trademark “Taco Tuesdays with Maury.” That’s the only day of the week Maury eats pussy.

Barbaro is rolling over in his Elmer’s bottle. 

Glass you say?

Is the Air Force after the Roadrunner too?

Did somebody say...Mach 5?

Super, man!

and more powerful than a locomotive.

That’s faster than a speeding bullet!

Your expectations are too high. Blow out your candles.

That Colonel Sanders interpretation looks like Anna Kendrick doing KFC cosplay.

“Your goal: win the Colonel’s love, become his business partner, grab a few buckets of coleslaw, and see where the evening takes you.”

Speaking about headlines, this one hasn’t aged well:

These are the same parents who are in denial about their son’s 24/7 access to porn online. Frankly, getting the hots for a nice girl on the swim team is about the most wholesome thing they could do.

Love this comment. I was a sheltered girl who blossomed at 13 with NO IDEA that I looked different. I could not count how many times I heard comments from GROWN men and women that I knew exactly what I was doing, or that I was intentionally walking a certain way or any number of comments. It makes me sick. I would…

Me: *shows your comment to my boyfriend*
Him: “Or they could just wear briefs instead of boxers.”
Me: “Or they could just not stare at underage girls’ butts.”
Him: “I didn’t finish reading the sentence; I was stuck back on the part where somehow men still didn’t comprehend how their own underwear works.”

Quayle was better known for getting into a real world spat with Murphy Brown, a fictional sitcom character, about bearing children out of wedlock. This was promptly written into the show, making Quayle look especially foolish. The episode ended with Brown pulling one of her signature pranks, having a truck load of…

It’s “intergluteal cleft apertures.” in a situation like this, never curb your euphemisms.

you said but plugs.