I watched The Conjuring during the day yesterday and I had to sleep with the lights on. It is the worst thing to like horror movies, have a vivid imagination, and sleep alone:/

I stopped going to a beloved local pub when the manager replaced a competent, average-looking bartender with a girl who was lovely-looking but spoke little english and had zero server experience. I’ll never forget ordering a gin and tonic and seeing the look of stark confusion on her face. “You want gin...like, it is…

/dead

From Farryn Johnson’s complaint:

As long as they make the men wear the same thing, I’m good with it.

If Donald Trump wants to make the city streets safer, he and Dr. Carson should stay off of them.

Jho Low is not linked to J Lo according to Le-o, but Lilo says yolo while eating a ho ho and this is all a no no.

I am seriously wondering if this is tomato, there's something familiar about his stupid patter.

“He had taken to unfurling a giant poster of her and showing it to businessmen.”

She’s beautiful? The work she has had done makes her look like a cat.

Wait, so in this version Ryan Lochte fucked up someone elses property, acted like an asshole, and didn’t actually lose any money. He is the Trump of Urinegate 2016.

Shammy can we keep the freakish nerd typing arguments down its my Friday I plan to socialize a bit later setting a bad early precedent here

The No. 2 won the Money In The Bank ladder match. Therefore guaranteeing himself a shot against No. 1 whenever he wants. Pretty common knowledge, if you ask me.

I have the same gait when I have to poop.

Sounds like we’ve been cooking our brains on “Low” these past 100 years then. I mean, just look at Jill “I’m a trained medical doctor I am not a crank” Stein! And also Trump and his supporters.

Based on your rather embarrassing history with the argument from ignorance, maybe you should steer clear of discussing logical fallacies. You clearly aren’t very good at it.

I probably need to look into why this annoys me so. But I’m not going to. This annoys me. I’m annoyed. And I’ve decided to be okay with it.

As a production assistant who has been screamed at by Sarah Jessica Parker for not supplying green only M&Ms and enough Evian to shower in, I can tell you there is nothing more terrifying than a horse with an unfamiliar rider.