Instead of yogurt, try kefir.

Well, I guess I can stop trying to get the trifecta. I already have the other two and only wanted Vaporeon for this.

He only has like five assists this year! PASS THE BASEBALL CARMELO SUZUKI.

I want him to remind me I should check the air in my tires before we go to an early dinner at Chili’s where he totally doesn’t say anything when I order a large margarita.

He’s a DILCBMNPIDK: Dad I’d like to cuddle but maybe not platonically? idk

Tim Kaine isn’t mad at the Republican party, he’s just disappointed.

For fuck’s sake.

He looks like Christian Bale’s character in American Psycho.

ha! snorlax? lapras? yeah thats going to level you up real fast. those brutes pale in comparison to my 100 pidgeys. pokemon go isnt about catching them all, its about catching pidgeys. all of the pidgeys. level up, catch more pidgeys. screw gyms, catch more pidgeys. out of pokeballs? good, that means youve caught a…

Interesting that the Redskins and Braves both have reservations about other people taking what’s their’s.

Pittsburgh matched theirs with soot and urine, so.....

Alaska is the easy winner in 50-state war because they’re protected by a buffer of Canadian kindness.

So white and so salty

I tried this once with my girlfriend, did NOT end well.

NFL fans in general are the retarded-brother-that-lives-in-the-basement of sportsfans.

White privilege

Losing to the Reds should count as two losses, and beating them should count as nothing.

Homer? Arigato! Mr. J Votto.

#allcardinalslossesmatter