well.

My very unscientific analysis says that 50% of people that watched The Sound of Music Live were hatewatching. Why are you gonna bite the hand that feeds, NBC? Ratings are ratings.

Emma and Bandit. RIP, Noah.

I want to hug him extra hard right now. Even though he puked on the rug 30 minutes ago.

Oh my God, you sound like ten of my most annoying customers ever, all rolled into one.

This story makes me WHY? so much. Thank you for cats.

Assuming an average penis length of 5.5 inches (the first number I found (I'm not going to try that hard)) that is .87 miles of penis. She would need 1500 more men for a mile of dong.

Never ate bread on the ship again.

Wanda Sykes would have been the perfect host. That said, my love for Jim Gaffigan is never ending.

I wouldn't say that she looks better than my wife did at that point, because my wife looked beautiful, of course, but you know, if I weren't a considerate husband, and I was speaking objectively, I might say that.

She's been looking amazing on Nashville, like seriously glowing. I know that's makeup and stuff but she looks similarly glowy here.

I was sad too when I found out he was short (I'm by no means tall but I'm def several inches taller than that). And yet the man is still on my top 5 list because he seems like such an amazing person and his voice is like silk. Also, height doesn't matter when you're laying down AMIRITE? LADIES?

First, I am so sorry. What happened to you is horrifying and I hope you are recovering.

How many girlfriend was it?

Or if you're the bookish type, you read Ella Enchanted!

I think he just ran out of fucks. It happens to everyone eventually.

At least now I have the perfect completer look to go with my vajazzling.

i feel like almost all the ladies made a pact to dress like fancy couches and frankly they all look gr8