We had a Blue Apron subscription for a while, and I felt like the recipes were EXCEEDINGLY bland. I don’t know how you can manage to make persimmons and chestnuts taste like nothing, but somehow it is possible.

If the total bill is $24.00 I’m not sure you can say “Kendall parties”. Where I come from that’s only a little more than lunch for two at Burger King.

Opinion: everyone should have to survive off of service industry jobs and wages for a year. It would make society a nicer place.

“I Cant Believe Its Not Herpes!”

Even if it was real and he had no way to get out that day, some time in the next WEEK he should have gotten his ass over there.

Not enough fake gold plating everywhere apparently.

Given his track record for weirdly impersonal interactions with this child, he’ll probably try to give the kid a hardy handshake, congratulate him on coming out of his mother’s vagina, and give him an iTunes gift card or something.

HAHAHAHA stop it. Get used to this tunnel. It is your home.

Double Dutch was the setting for multiple instances of humiliation for me in elementary school.

Who?

“I, Donny T, am coming out today to pardon myself for everything I have ever done, which is nothing, and totally all Hillary and Obama’s fault because they are mean terrible people who bigly tarnished my reputation, but I am not going to own it and am totally innocent.”

The only mild comfort I have when I read things like this is that this dude is old and fat and tired and ugly and clearly his loneliness and isolation have made him miserable for the majority of his life. What joy has he ever really experienced that didn’t also make him feel secretly, deeply, crushingly inadequate?…

John McCain is one of those Senators that I feel most conflicted about. The guy went through shit and torture and for years was a moderate in the GOP but recently his devotion to Party Loyalty (seemingly thinking he’ll get something in return) has seen him hypercritically vote on bills for years now (similar to Ken…

He has better compliments for dictators than he does for his own son... it’s brutal, but in a really satisfying way. :)

No doubt Trump’s noticed that Amelia Earhart has done an amazing job and is getting recognized more and more.

Wow, it’s almost as if a guy who is a known sexual abuser doesn’t think women are his equals. Wow.

She never had a chance; her name is Makenna.

What pisses me off most about President Dipshit inserting himself in this story is that per his proposed healthcare reform, the children suffering like that here at home would be left to die while their parents are saddled with a copious amount of medical debt.

I’m to the point where the only thing I found surprising about this is that he’s figured out how to embed a video in a tweet.

I really hope Annie makes it. Sweet dreams are made of this!