Man I missed Bear Friday last week. I barely knew what it was then, just that I lacked it.

Fuck you. San Jose gets demerits for Silicon Valley dipshits, but it is definitely a top-50 city.

This is the written manifestation of scooping a shit out of the toilet, taking a long, nose-in-the-glass sniff, then pronouncing its qualities and flaws at length.

Proving yet again that this baby is the Cassandra of our times and his/her discomfort rightfully knows no bounds.

Connecticut’s absolute domination is impressive but it makes me wish the WNBA were more of a draw. How do you make women’s college basketball more competitive? You offer its best player a chance to play in a professional league that’s lucrative and exciting. Then you offer her the no. 1 pick in the draft after her…

Jesus.

You keep on citing the Florida senate race on the idea that the DNC is funding a republican to block a progressive. Their funding Patrick Murphy, who was a Republican in 2011, but has been a successful Democratic congressman since 2012. He’s a little centrist for my tastes, sure I don’t begrudge him the party change-…

As a Kings fan, I find myself remembering that part in Orwell’s 1984 describing a boot forever pressing on your face. This has to let up eventually, right? The same people who rather brilliantly managed to keep the team in town can’t just forever fuck up the product.

If the Trump shitstorm hits full blast and Hillary/Bernie acquit themselves well, I do think 60 is actually possible. The Dems are running non-some dude candidates in 14 of the Republican-held seats so far (15, if you count independent Margaret Stock in Alaska). Also, while Louisiana and Kansas are redder than beets,…

Well, priorities I guess. I suppose I would deal with a certain amount of ass/underwear stank for mind control powers. Or at least self-control powers. I could use those.

I maintain they would have set box office records if they went in a more family friendly, cleaner direction:

+1

I chose to believe the bear escaped after they tried to feed him Skyline Chili. Because I am a cruel bastard, I let my sister try that crap when she came to visit. She spent an hour on the toilet and fled the city shortly thereafter.

When you gotta go, you gotta go.

Why No.2, of course

I was born in Northern California in a neutral area so as to reasonably have the childhood choice to root for the Sacramento Kings or the Golden State Warriors as my home team. I chose the Sacramento Kings. Because I am a sad adult instead of a front-running child, I continue to cheer for the Sacramento Kings, despite…

Stick to silence

I used to think that my lack of belief in “one perfect solemate” was part of my dislike of the concept of destiny, but now I see that I was DESTINED to not believe so that I could one day say, with no second thoughts, that I wouldn’t repeatedly fuck a goat. Thank you destiny! My mother would be so proud and her herd…

I also had andouillette while in Paris. I walked into a quiet little cafe with a smiling waitress/possible owner who looked a lot like Virgina Madsen. It was my last day, so I threw down and said, “I’d like your most unusual dish, something I’ve never had before.” She hemmed and hawed for a moment before saying that…