It's pretty ridiculous that an Oscar-winning actress who is widely considered one of the best at her craft would have to negotiate that substantial a pay raise to be equal to "not the one who was engaged to Miley."

Kenna needs to slow the fuck down.

I just had to share this story. When I was 21 or 22, I happened to be in town for one of my cousin's 11th birthdays. I went over to my aunt and uncle's apartment, where I found that she had just received her birthday gift from the lady of questionable virtue upstairs.

This isn't me, but it was a guy I was dating at the time. We had vermicelli for dinner. There was one little dried bit of vermicelli stuck to the botom of the pot. Boyfriend, who was always cleaning pots and pans with his hands first to "save sponges" (WTF even is that) was cleaning it and decided to scrape the piece…

I legit slipped on a fresh banana peel once and went ass over teakettle. I know, Mythbusters says they're not slippery but I DID. It was pure cliche slapstick comedy, and even though my ego was probably the most bruised thing it was just so fucking ridiculous it counts as the dumbest.

one in three of them say they would be willing to "use force to obtain intercourse" as long as nobody would find out and there would be no consequences.

I once severed my tongue (did you know they could reattach those?) in a library, on the first day after their renovations (I ended up volunteering there 15 years later, it was apparently legend.) I tripped and bit it clear off.

Dislocated my jaw by yawning.

I yawned my face off.

one of our swedish ones? Shaped like a paddle? (Applauds adultosaur....)

work wife

I am 45 and wouldn't be caught dead with my hair like that, thank you very much.

can i say (with the obvious caveats that this was a horrible tragedy), the rush of so many news outlets to praise the work of Charlie Hebdo seems weird to me? Because I'm not really cool with supporting hateful imagery in the guise of "satire" or whatever the fuck they thought they were doing.

I guess this guy is the new Spieling Peter Pan?

My boss is an older guy, and he takes a nap every afternoon at work.

Childhood is insisting you are too grown up for a nap. Adulthood is wishing desperately that you could squeeze in a nap.

I LOVE EVERYBODY

The nude leotard is nude because Sia wanted to strip everything from the dancers and make them seem vulnerable, which reflects the feelings she had as a child. Maddie represents a young Sia, hence the wig - it's the same cut as Sia's hair. Shia is supposed to evoke her father who dealt with mulitple personality…

No family, no job, no possessions, no pets...

* We wake up and cuddle, talk, make love, be affectionate.

Everyone wants a boyfriend who is a good boss. A boyfriend who doesn't tolerate slacking, who has a bedroom in which you will not be sleeping, and who wants a muse.