The only crime I see here is the vertical video.

Had a pet duck. Named him Elliott because his tiny wings were just like Elliott the dragon's, from Pete's Dragon. Ducks are fun pets. Mine thought he was a dog and would eat spiders.

Now is the time to confess my lifelong dream to own a pet duck that I can named Michael Quackson.

She asked for extinguishing, not sterilization...

MY LOINS

More like Grey’s of Thrones, amirite?!

My favorite though, was when I overheard a new employee who was prepping cucumbers and talking to the dish washer. She thought it was really dishonest that we said some of our sandwiches were vegetarian or vegan when they contained cucumber. The dishwasher was confused and said that cucumbers were vegetables. The…

Well, she’s no Kevin James...

I don't, just because being First Lady must fucking suck no thank you

What do you see as the FLOTUS’ legacy in the feminist cannon?

I would be happy to spend all my days on the internet writing positive things about Michelle to make up for the racists.

He’s allowed to look however he wants and he doesn’t have to be anything for QUILTBAGs, that’s not in question at all and not where I’m pointing out discongruity. It’s drawing the conclusion that this reframes what masculinity looks like and is. It might be validating to feel like that’s what you’ve done with all the…

Breaking the stereotype of what a man “should and shouldnt be” doesn’t really register when you’re buff rowdy like that. Maybe it breaks down one stereotype but simply reaffirms another.

I think it also feeds into peoples needs/desires to be special as it’s not just “unfashionable” diseases (e.g. mental illness) that people reject, it’s common ones - like scabies. Common diseases are what other people get, I’m a super special snowflake, my illness is super rare, nobody understands my suffering.

At first glance, she was wearing a crown. I approved.

Nah, after that whole 47% thing that helped him lose the 2012 election, I don’t think he’ll run again.

It’s from the sermon on the mount, the specific instructions re:public/private prayer is in Matthew 6:5-8. There are other parts of the bible that reiterate this, and Jesus never publicly prays (he’ll give blessings and thanks, as well as preach to his followers, but not actual prayers. He is frequently described as…

I imagine he’d be saying (in Latin or Arabic):

The Craft!

2 Live Crew did it first.