I AM GOING TO SEE THE MARTIAN!! Creeeeeepy. Also I’m getting home drunk tonight starting 3 hours ago.

When I think of bath salts, I think of the guy who ate the other guy’s face off while on bath salts. #bestweddingever

Yeah, that is my go to for all outdoor animals. It’s either yelling or severe baby talk.

You are the best and I need tea.

There has to be a German word for that

Because people NEVER put drugs/drinking and self destructive behavior on social.

I have not been to rehab but are you allowed phones? and vines? and instagrams? It seems very counter productive.

Oh you know that asshole has a monogrammed thermos.

“smirkin” really made my day ❤️

He is very handsome and medium talented but does he look a little turtle-ish to anyone else? (just a little)

I’m always/never fucking with you!! Posh’s stink face but charming speaking voice gets her 2nd place.

I would subscribe to your newsletter.

Look at you!! I love it

Oh god I would love to call someone cheeky with an accent! You are living a great life Juju

Sporty in the middle and Pish LAST? Bold moves my friend

Spice Girls in order of awesome: Ginger, Posh, Scary, Baby and Sporty?

<333 I would do fun undereye dark circles/dark lips, trace some veins on your face and arms and maybe some interestingly patterned rashes? But like fashion rashes obv.

I think you already know the answer in your heart (fab)