My university, being a Jesuit school, had no fraternities or sororities. We still had parties, friendship, student activities, community service, and alumni donations. Fraternities and sororities serve absolutely no purpose. None.

This. Everything about this. Thank you.

This year’s fiesta included mini-tambourines for us to shake while dancing to Miriam’s Song and it was one of the better things to ever happen.

Oh my G-d, this is amazing. I may have to start hosting my own.

Right, that part. We did the whole slog when I was a kid, but I tried to pay as little attention as possible. The only Seder I’m attending this year is a feminist Seder (which you should check out if you’ve never been to one!) so Miriam plays a much larger role.

Passover tells the story of Moses and the Exodus from Egypt, no? I don’t think Joseph is a major player in this one.

Done.

Well, I BELIEVE that all avocados falling from the sky are perfectly ripe. There, fixed it.

I believe that unicorns come in a variety of colors. I believe that it’s currently raining avocados. I believe that my kitchen floor is cleaning itself, right now.

I like to believe that Anna Wintour is physically incapable of an ugly cry.

I actually scrolled back up just now because I was hoping I was incorrect to include the hyphen in the original post. Alas, I was not.

Penal code. Tee hee.

To the protestors with the “Keep Ireland Abortion-Free” signs...Ireland (and every other country) is not abortion-free and has never been. Admitting it is the first step.

Ohh, that makes sense. Still keeping it!

Totes not going to ignore the fact that you referred to me as a goddess and I’m going to pretend it’s not a typo.

RIGHT, Maury. I honestly couldn’t remember...clearly my priorities are out of whack.

Oh please please please would some woman come forward and claim she gave birth to Trump’s love child at some point in the past twenty years. Bonus points if we could also arrange a Jerry Springer-style reveal of the paternity test results.

Two things:

Not to hijack the conversation, but THIS IS WHY YOU VOTE BLUE NO MATTER WHO.

Maybe if men start buying tampons to have on hand, tampons will become less expensive. Isn’t that how it works?