True story: I knew the winning word in last year’s spelling bee. “Scherenschnitte,” which is a German word for the art of cutting paper. Learned the word, and how to spell it, during a class art project in fourth grade. I would like my retroactive pizza party now, please and thank you.

When does this young man’s article come out? I’d like to read his perspective.

Had this not already happened?

When in doubt, blame the gays.

It’s like being capable of doing your job has nothing to do with genitalia and the military would be remiss to count out a competent service member based on it.

True story: A tarot card reader once told me, years ago, that I was going to get fat. I’m seven months pregnant, so maybe he was onto something.

You do you, Caitlyn. A Republican senate bid based on LGBT equality is sure to get a LOT of traction from the party’s base, not to mention the Brietbart-addled fringe (is there a difference between the two these days? I can’t remember).

I seem to remember something to this effect from the campaign trail. It came from...what’s her face...Hillary Clinton. Sigh.

She did say that- told both girls that singing is great but that school should always come first. It was awesome.

Yeah, this is what our church leaders should be focusing on. Not feeding the hungry or caring for the sick or, you know, other things the Bible mentions.

That’s my big concern. I’m very seriously considering doing the SAHM thing for a year-ish and I am terrified of only encountering “that” type of mom. Blech.

I’m pregnant with my first and have already prepped my best “twilight sleep” jokes for birthing class. How do I find mom friends like you? What is their habitat like? Are they good at camouflage? Is there a special password I need to be aware of? Thanks in advance.

And DeVos will be offering Abigail Fisher a job in 3, 2, 1...

Precisely. I almost wish the audience of this site was a little more politically diverse. I’d love to see a hardline conservative try to answer that question. Actually, on second thought, no- because I know what they’d say. Something along the lines of “we’re protecting women from feeling regret over abortions” and…

And when pregnant women can’t access healthcare for themselves or their babies, they’re on their own? How is that pro-life?

She was a “GENTILE, loving lady?” (Emphasis mine.) I don’t think that’s the word you meant to use.

Proper digestion is number two.

My pup falls into the “whore” category. He’s very loyal, but nothing makes him happier than being the center of attention. Our vet once had to vaccinate him as he was lying on his back soliciting belly rubs. He was undistracted from his mission.

Here is my pet. His name is Hoosier. He’s a very good boy. Fun fact: This weirdo fucking LOVES going to the vet. LOVES it.

Welcome to District 13, everyone.