Wow, 75% of their power comes from nuclear? Clap clap clap. It's only 19% here in the US.

Wait, South Park taught me that whatever you put in your butt comes out your mouth. Did they lie?!?!

"The ship will sink with about 8,000 litres (2,113 gallons) of diesel on board. But the vessel is far enough from the nearest coastline that any spillage would dissipate naturally."

Why don't they just make them look like real glasses? Those hipster kids with their cool thick black frames are all the rage these days anyways.

What an irresponsible 7 year old I was. I should've kept better care of them instead of shoving them in my pocket, trading them with my friends, and actually sticking them on things. If only I would've known.

Oh yeah, my bad. I must've been thinking of Blue Chips or something.

When is Thomas Ian Nicholas going to make Rookie of the Year 2? I bet Nolte would be in for sure.

I heard that on the radio this morning. Very sad. I guess it was one of the last things they could sell out on.

Every Single Thing In the Whole Wide World Is Potentially Hacked Right Now

No magic bullets? How am I supposed to make my margaritas?!?

No Gemma Arterton, no deal! Same with you Prince of Persia 2: More Sand Less Time!

It's not as bad as his monkey voice in the Zookeeper*!

Everclear and ice FTW!

How is JetBlue still in business? There seems to be an incident on their planes at least once a month.

Man, I hope ya'll haven't written the "Tail of Mears" post yet. You're going to get lit up for that indian-giver line!

Didn't China just launch something that we shot down....errr I mean, that ended up exploding spontaneously?

Inigo Montoya: You are wonderful.

It's like you KNEW the guy above you was going to write that. Cahoots!!!

Sorry I worded that wrong. I am an AT&T customer, and I get an upgrade every 18 months. You must be on their black list.

I don't know how AT&T works, but I am eligible for an upgrade every 18 months.