.

Racist.

Wait...you’re NOT supposed to wipe you post-crap ass with your phone?

Yeah.

Gurl, this is God’s work.

Everytime I read that word now, I hear Worf saying it.

Done it!

“A sexy contemporary take on Oliver Twist..”

Somebody called me Sebastian...

Yoko loves me? Cool. Thanks, momma.

But her fans wonder where that work ethic is when she’s giving them late and lazy shows they’re actually paying her for.

.

It’s ALL about being a Career Gal!

You really suck
I have no reason to see you
This world is filled with guys like you
You s-s-suck
Your flaws are countless
To just put up with it and love you
Is a waste of time

.

Jezebel’s Schumer obsession is...questionable.

Just a couple of Tea Party soccer moms chattin’ at Panera!

“I’m so self-hating that I can read minds now!”

Reading this leads to feeling like what I imagine East Germans felt when being tortured by the Stasi.