Yay for the Sodastream! I love mine and its fizzy, fizzy goodness. And it's legitimately the only thing in the damn kitchen I have not injured myself on. That oven is gorgeous but would mean my certain doom.

A guy in my neighborhood drives a truck with the bumper sticker: "Pro God. Pro Life. Pro Gun." Okay.

This may never make it out of the greys, but I have got me a shit story to tell, so here goes.

I hear you on the Scottish accents. I lived in Glasgow for a year in college: SPLOOSH.