General non-alignment

Yeah, if there’s one place you’ll typically  hear a lot of mispronunciations, it’s on a blog.

Thanks Wade Ude

We hate you because you are 53 years old and you say things like,

They’ve been in a Super Bowls for the majority of my life and I’m 38. Fuck off

Yep. This is why anytime I sense that I am beginning to fall, I immediately put my hands behind my back and try to land on my face. It’s a well-known fact that the face is the most durable part of the human body.

When I was a kid, my brother got away with everything. He would instigate, I would retaliate, and then I’d be the one who got punished for it. I knew it was because he was the baby of the family, but it still made me mad.

You see, the crease is lava. And you can’t be in the lava with the ball or you catch on fire. You can be in the lava accidentally without the ball, but you have to leave immediately.

Sorry, that wasn’t very clear on my part. What I meant is that in the 90s, car makers started putting decent stereos in their cars. And as a result, the ‘need’ to put an aftermarket stereo into cars pretty much diminished (and, because they were harder to pull out or looked more integrated or what have you, thieves…

Madden and high school football are the same thing as the NFL. It’s not like there is some super secret play and rules that make the game different. The players are better, and some of the rules are slightly different - that’s it. The play would have been made the same from pee-wee to NFL.

They were in cover 4 prevent if I recall correctly. That was a perfect call, keep everyone in front of you and inbounds, wrap up, game over. That poor S went for the big hit, nothing the coaches can do about that.

You know the seven chakras, but instead we have eight.

suckerdumped there weren’t we

I’ll bet the guy who threw the punch is the type of guy who calls 3 second violations while playing pick up games at the Y.

When I heard he left nothing to his children from his first marriage, I got a bit torn...was he very good?

Yeah, I agree, Deadspin should be running an article every week on how great Brady is.

RIP Derby. We will miss your wisdom, good boy.

Probably a Morgan, with the wooden chassis.

You couldn’t be more wrong. My son was immaculately conceived as well. My wife got pregnant even though we hadn’t had sex at all in the month she conceived. So miracles do happen if you put your faith in Jesus.