Great squiggly miggly.

Oh yes, I do. My sisters wedding: Hot hot hot!

That’s what Wikipedia says, and they’re never wrong about anything.

It’s better than you can imagine. Written by John Tesh, and recorded in 2004.

Any excuse to post this is a good thing.

Adorable Pokemon? Yes. Sexy? I guess, if that’s your thing.

That’s why I only park my boat in a garage.

Just a padawan? I think this gif might be more accurate.

If I were on a phone call and heard someone on the other side flush, I think I’d throw my own phone down. I’m no doctor, but I’m pretty sure I read somewhere that toilet cooties can be transmitted through cell phones.

It looks like Alf or Jar Jar Binks in a storm trooper helmet.

I got off on the same “only on replay” technicality. And as I walked out of the courthouse a free man I yelled, “no take backs”, so legally, I’m in the clear.

Well, considering it was two nights ago that some dumbfuck accused me stealing a joke, I’m pretty sure I had let it go.

I remember getting a physical in the eight grade sporting a Scientific American boner. How embarrassing.

I’m hoping the tall, gaunt, emaciated running back will make a comeback.

For a couple of years I lived practically next door to my school, but we were supposed to take the bus because there were railroad tracks between us. It was literally stop, get on, drive a hundred feet, get off. My brother and I walked anyway because we were bad motherfuckers.

This is why so many players have Jenrry Mejia on speed dial.

I loved him in Hannibal.

I don’t mean to get all back in my day, but back in my day school buses made one or 2 stops where an entire neighborhood of kids had gathered. Now they stop at every damn house.

You forgot to include a picture!

When I do this, I generally get naked before I get on the field. You also need to get slippery so security can’t get a good grip on you. MLB stadiums banned bringing in outside Vaseline after 9/11, so you can just rub yourself down with a stadium burger. Note: Do not try the hamburger thing in a stadium near a large…