One armed Bandits

An oldie but goodie.

This is what I would expect from Pixar.

Is that Lotion Lizard?

Beware of vampire bats!

Boo. These jokes are all terrible. Go back to your fallout shelter and have a glass of Tang. Ba dum tss. And I don’t mean Tang in the modern vaginal sense. I mean tang in the orange sugar water, astronaut sense. Ba dum tss. And while you’re at it, why don’t you take my wife to the fallout shelter, please. Ba dum tss.…

I would take Larry Killick over both Dick Holub and Walt “Moose” Dropo in the 1947 draft. Dick Holub was drafted 5th, but only lasted one season as pro. Walt “Moose” Dropo was drafted 4th, but the stupid fucker thought he could play baseball. Larry Killick, on the other hand, was drafted 10th, and went on to be named…

There is nothing I want more than a robot with a noggin from the baby in Eraserhead wandering around my house at night.

I don’t know where I first saw this. It may have been here, so forgive me if I’m just posting something everyone’s seen before. And while it lacks the artistry of the movies above, it makes up for that with ridiculous inventive awesomeness. Enjoy.

I immediately copy and pasted Penhaligon’s toilette set into the address bar to google it, because it sounded so awesome, then I realized it didn’t say toilet seat.

If I were God, I would ban the use of Yakety Sax for eternity. Kneel down and feel my wrath irritating world!

This is way more entertaining if you imagine that they’re chasing a backup goaltender that escaped from his pen.

Now I feel bad for naming my kid after him. Poor little Inghausen.

The “Hi Mom” wave just kills me.

It’s not open-air, but I’ll take if they can make it a bit taller.

No balcony, no deal.

I was thinking of him passed out drunk, pants around his his ankles, ass in a litterMaid. The little arm that clears the clears the poop away keeps coming up, only to be turned away again and again by his left butt-cheek.

That editing made me think it took off in reverse.

Why do you jump to such a negative conclusion? The man is a artisanal farmer.