Can we get one of these explaining the differences between a Citation and a pile of crap?

Great news everyone! Mike Utley lifted a fork!

Breaking News: Donald Trump labels new highways as drug addicts and rapists. Possibly, originally paved in Kenya.

He may have done wrong, but he was pressured into participating. You can find details of what happened by reading the book he wrote titled “River of Doubt”. Spoiler alert! He kills himself at the end.

Here is a rundown of how the scam worked.

The worst part is that it would be so easy to make this movie great. Just replace all the orcs with ewoks, and BAM! Fixed. What a shame. What a waste.

It’s like I’ve been saying all season. The Warriors are beatable if you simply throw more balls in the ring. I don’t understand how it took the league so long to figure this out.

Woops. This was an accidental comment. But instead of just leaving a period like most lesser people do, I’d like to take the time to ask everyone if they’ve accepted Jesus into their hearts.

Seriously?

How did you even think of this comment?

And what do you get for COTD?

What a vulgar display. Ever heard the expression “act like you’ve been there before”? This situation obviously calls for a finger roll.

So, I liked this video up until the end, when a woman says “Coconuts TV” in the bawdiest way possible. Now I’m stuck with the dreaded work erection. Thanks Obama.

In the mid eighties, my 6th grade teacher was this racist old WW2 vet. When he wasn’t, not so subtly, exhibiting his hatred of the the Jews, he was going off on people in fancy cars with their bucket seats. It was always the bucket seats that seemed to set offend him the most. And who invented the bucket seat? George…

Is “zika baby” a new hairstyle?

I just thought of the best nickname for Noah Syndergaard. Here are my thoughts on how I arrived at it. Syndergaard’s parents, as we all know, met at a sommelier themed YMCA dance in 1981. Barnardulous Syndergaard VII (Noah’s dad) only heard about this dance because his friend Dickschmap Washinghair had seen a flier…

-Oh man, I’ve got something in my eye.

But the name Sasquatch comes from those dirty Canadians!