Many would want me to attack the Bible itself as irrelevant by analyzing its history, its writers, and its translations for errors. Others would want me to attack modern Christians, stating that they attack homosexuality while ignoring numerous other things mentioned as sins. However, I find both methods disrespectful…

That would be a shame. I’m glad I remember Don Drysdale as the guy who had his Hall of Fame ring stolen by a hooker.

Reading through the comments here now is like reading a Bleacher Report slideshow, only with less comedy.

“She's got younger kids and I've got [four adult] kids, and we go through the same things everybody else does: Trying to find the Polident, hiding from bookies, massaging grandpa’s ego/penis...[Pete trails off and stares blankly at the wall for a moment] You know, couple stuff.”

Breaking: Rob Gronkowski arrested for beating the shit out of Eckhart Tolle.

I'll never forget the look of betrayal on Linden's face as he turned around to face the shark and uttered, "Et tu, Brute?" before succumbing.

It’s not nice to poke fun at folk who suffer from Fred McGriff Syndrome.

These are a few excerpts from the book I'm writing called My Life Following Derek: a retrospective of my life following Derek Jeter. (working title)

You know whats great at shooting free throws, Blake. The 2012 Kia Optima.

Looking at the picture, the new technology appears to be the creation of at least three 50 foot tall robotic players as well as a free love section known as the 69ers.

Enough is enough! This remind me of how any hopes of The Adventures of Milo and Otis 2 were dashed because some stodgy animal rights freaks thought there was something wrong with throwing an adorable defenseless kitten of a cliff and into the ocean. Everyone knows cats love falling and water.

No matter how hard he tries, he’ll never break the record of his older brother Higher Octavio Dotel as the only castrato to star in 22 major European operas.

I just watched the movie, and in that exact moment, Seth Green is deciding whether or not to try and coerce his 11 year old girlfriend to get an abortion. He does, but she refuses. That baby grew up to to play Anakin Skywalker in The Phantom Menace.

And the dirtiest U2 player in the world is once again Adam "Stanky" Clayton.

I was born on the exact day Ishtar came out, which explains why no one will hire me in a rock and role band.

I earned a gold medal in the Jericho wall jump, which, to be honest, hasn't been that impressive for around 3500 years.

Oh, Come on! I solved this problem years ago with the introduction of my silly putty desktop surface.

Barring a dismissal, Sandusky has requested the he be allowed to play himself in any reenactments of the alleged crimes.

I believe it was Chris Kaman walking around in the woods wearing nothing but a black wife beater and his signature red Robin Hood cap that was responsible for the recent ivory billed woodpecker sightings.